Finding a way out

Without realizing I had already 365 post with me. Time flew. 2011 is going to end soon and everyone is welcoming the 2012. There's the forward post on facebook where people get to inbox ones and get honest answer. There's always a trend where people will get along with. Same goes to the tetris battle game. I somehow got bored to it. Feeling that my lappie is kind of lack. I always wonder.

Is 30 now and everyone might have finish or half done with their 2012 resolution. Here I am still feeling miserable and lost in the center of the ocean. Im feeling blur with my future. I don't have any aim. Im so going to read all type of courses till I got interested in one of them.
One more thing. the 31 plan is cancelled. So, I will be all alone at home now. *sobsob*. Eww~ damn envy and somehow get jealous of those who get to shop and hang out all day long. Me : forever alone. Having meeting for this very few days. Don't really have time for my friends. Busy woman here trying to earn money and you know she just want to hide all those creepy feelings inside making herself occupied and not so lifeless. I'll try to work out that day although still having no idea what to do to make it a memorable ones. Maybe I shall work out my resolution or any suggestion please.

Kindergarten is an awesome place for me. Kids are cute. Lovable as well. Im going to love them wholehearted.   Their smile make my day. Learning is a process of growing *wink*

Mitra DYC 16th

Its the 5th year for me. This is the camp which I want to join over and over again cause its just simply fun. Nothing really special about it but you will definitely want to come back another year as for every participant without any rigid reason. Im in admin department this year. Learning really a lot from the leader, from the committee and also the participant. Whatever we sow we reap. Feedback and comment make me grow. So, another year of fun for me being a faci for group 1. Kindly present you my group the "annoying orange". Damn annoying. Guess what, my group get no.1 this year, no.1 from the back, haha. As long as we have fun and enjoy every single game, who cares about the place. Lack of sleeping time, in result I get bigger eye bag. Swollen eye on the 2nd day which I need to wake up early for preparing puja. What more, I get new friends. Eating maggi mee for supper in the midnight with Ivan and See while discussing insect specimen. Taking nap but turn out falling a sleep and almost miss dinner with Yen. Carrying umbrella to shed Er in the raining hour scare that he might fall a sick again. Splash Justin with water balloon as I win the match. Treat from Jason. Random crap with Chia wei and Tuck long ride. Running here and there like mad as the distance of the pagoda and the toilet is kinda far. Bath for long hour like im soaking myself in the swimming pool during the captain ball hour. Sleep and wake up with bunch of friends make me feel warm in the heart. Lying on the floor its like straighten up my bone. Sitting there day dreaming when there's no one approach to my station. I like every single me in the camp. I can be my real self with no books, no stress, no fake smile. Wearing big size shirt, just that I cant wear shorts there. Thanks to my group leader, Chun seng. He is a big size guy in the sense that he is tall as well. Stop commenting him, he might get angry later. Kinda emotional sometimes, strong determination he had. And Er who bring laughter and joy to our group. He is very cute with his chubby face and his drawing as well. Damn cute la, everyone love him and fortunately he is in my group and I get to be special. And our group members, you guys did a great job. You're the best. *wink*

Its all after exam

The exam freaking days or should i called it a month is over finally. But somehow I don't feel like Im putting my 100% effort in it and the result might me nah Im not coming here to frust out. Slacking. Boredom attacks me. Feel like going for a swim and soak myself in that big pool which manage to swamp away all those negative thinking of mine. But i already done that halfway before the pa paper 1. So you can see how relax my life goes even its at the critical moment of STPM examination days. Wait, wait and wait is all I can do now. Result should be coming out on Feb ? Oh, can anyone tell me what to do with the pin code, where should we register ourself for being part of the very first step registering ourself in the gate of university.

Praying really hard for a high grade (CGPA). I already know 4.0 is not mine, Im awake before it hits greatly right into me. Honestly, before stepping in form six, I don't really see the toughness for being a form six student. There's no project or assignment to handle. There's not much subject to be handle, only four. But as time flew, stress came, where I don't know why is it turning so and so. It should be fine I guess as I had this strong base of form five studies. But nothing come right if you are not hardworking enough. And the late realize of mine causing me a little nervous. Anyhow, I need to really thanks all teachers who taught me. They are the one who bring me up and turn me into a knowledgeable ones. Form six life making me a bit mature compare to the what-also-dunno small kid. Make me stronger and tougher to cross over all obstacle. Thanks for all those memory. It brought me up to who I am.

Its time for me to think about my future. I got no ambition. Sad people here. Coming across to whoever who start planning the great plan of theirs making me jealous. How could they having this great confident, being that brave, chasing towards their dream. I am very jealous with those people. Even with my sis, who is furthering her study in engineering course. A lady mechanical engineer should be a very tough way to walk through, yet I believe she will get to conquer it. So, in this nine months time, no should be two months time, I need to really find out what am I to.

Long holiday for me and this leads me to job finding. There's already some thought running in my mind. But the tough part is always interview. My communication skill is weak. I don't really get to talk a lot in a great way. It always die away half way. Where I need to crack my head to light it up. Typing and writing is always much more easier as we get to delete by pressing backspace or rub it away using the rubber if there's any mistake over there. Interview kills me. So, what I need to do now is to contact those boss and see how it goes lately.

Reading you are the apple of my eye. Half way done. Is nice indeed. I need to brush out some of my time with accounts as well. A random thought of mine. Lots of things need to be undone and I need to list it out before I forget. Oh ya, I want a set of puzzle, plenty of time freaks me out. Im going to frame it out once its done and be very proud of it. Its all cause of my brother who manage to finish the 1000 piece set of reborn puzzle, its super awesome. Erm erm.. what more. Oh ya meet out. Need to really spend some time with all those old friend. I miss them. They must be missing me as well =P Camp. One more day to go and I really need to seek for sleeping bag. No more I guess for now. Tell and remind me if I miss out any. Limited memory space of mine. My brain is still stuck with all those exam stuff. Oh, I just cut my hair by my own, I can't really get to stand that fringe of my poking my eye and make me looks like a grand old lady. But after this cut of mine, I look stubborn.

Lengthy post. Random thought. Crappy ones. Hope Im not being hatred.

Blur case girl

Hi, just bump into my blog as its been a long time not updating and someone is nagging right beside me. Nothing much to update as I forgot almost everything that happened this past few days. I just cant get to remember things well, Im getting old. 

A little sorry still to you. I know you just don't wanna hear this no more. But thats what come to my brain. The moment now is just pretty awkward. We are friend still right =)

There's lot of things going on and on in school. I just don't know how to describe it, I got no words come out from my mouth. So, I shall just remain silent in this critical moment of others. Wars started as usual and as usual im the one always being excluded. Small kid and innocent suit me much, Im being forced to admit as everyone proclaimed and named me in this way. Too bad, I was always the blur ones.

Lastly, this meaningful blessing which I always do it with the sunday school kids :

May I be well and happy

May my parents be well and happy

May my teachers be well and happy

May my relatives be well and happy

May my friends be well and happy

May my neighbours be well and happy

May all beings be well and happy

October begins

Arghhh.. Shutup. I know im onlin-ing again leaving the books all alone by themselves. 50 more days to go. Books haven done revising. Loads of exercise book haven been undone. What am I doing here.
Attended the blessing ceremony yesterday at tiratana. It was awesome indeed. Have been not praying for more than 2 months I guess. Learn the new way of puja and the E E E :) Thanks again for the Sri Lanka monk. So, buddha, dharma and sangha, lead me to the positive path.

Study week

... Its so call the study week as our school upper six student are given this PMR break for the entire week. The st.john group photo and etc is up on facebook. School is currently having some problem once more. Not going to talk much about it. I was just waiting for the buddhist society mp thats all. As STPM is nearer, people one by one is getting into serious study. So, off I go. I miss you. You are scoring for exam and im gonna chase you up. Guess what, you are on my password for this account and no one will get it right. Study time, no more one piece for now, haha =P

End of my love

This is my invitation card. And the windmill does function, it will spin whenever there's wind blowing across it. Thanks to all juniors which made this farewell party a successful ones. It really cheer me up a lot. Remembering how I put that much effort on this club raising fund by doing all those dedication, bunch of reports to be pass up where I don't have any reference from the previous senior because its a new club after all. Believe or not, I kinda love secretary job, but that much of work and time consuming do pissed me off sometimes. Anyhow, the farewell is awesome, you guys just did a great job with that funny jokes of the drama you scripted and acted out. Finally, thanks for that applause =)

Keep it up the good job. I know you guys will definitely work out this inconspicuous club very well with the cooperative and great team work among you guys. I believe my choice was right. So, group photo up next. Im waiting them to post up the photos, as my camera always get to sleep well in my comfort bag.

Attended also the fiesta de lunar of buddhist society the other day (sat). It does disappoint me a little, a lot actually =X Not comparing after all.

A late thank you

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. The birthday gifts. And as well as the special delivery cake.

Done with my trials. Terrible result. Time to really study, I think I just lack of quality time I guess.

dearest

Bye and hello after my trials

No regrets after all

:(

My birthday is on the trials itself

how sad is it

Im wasting time

...... too bad, Im doing this in this very critical time of mine. Its raya and everyone is happily enjoying their one week holiday and yet all those SPM-rians and STPM-rians trying hard to stuck themselves at home so that they get to finish all those exam syllabus. Things plan and like usual, I never get to follow all those plan. Wanted to get rid those entertainment but it certainly the hardest thing to do when its just right here in front of you. You just can't insist yourself to hold on the book. Your mind will be kind of swung and yeah Im day-dreaming.

I was not going to be at home during holiday. Cancelled all those friend invitation but there's certainly this family trip or gathering going on. This very beginning holiday is already being wasted. Went to the library to study and guess what, I accidentally slept there on that very comfortable sofa holding that Biology book. What a failure. I look stupid with that silly act I did. Anyhow, you gotta pay a visit to this PPAS - the shah alam library, it was awesome with those facilities. You will gonna get impress and feel amaze with it. The most expensive gadget there - Wii. Its such a technology and modern place.

So what now, Im going out tomorrow as well. Books Im going to miss you. That doesn't mean Im a nerdy. Im just not smart enough thats why. I need to put more effort on it and I always never get to do so. I regret somehow. My physical appearance always cheated lots of people out there. I know I look like a nerd but Im actually stupid. I read just because I don't feel like wasting those teacher effort. They pay off kinda lots and I myself have the responsibility to score well in the exam. Enough of crap today.

" Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring "

Can we ?

Hey you, had been a long time since we last chat. You trusted me and so do I. We don't share story. Weird people getting along with weird people, fair enough. So weird things come along as well. We don't talk after all. Its midnight now and this is the time where you actually come alive. Kids should sleep earlier and get enough sleeping time for a better outcome especially cute kid like you. Study time now, trial is so soon, stop those interruption which is so annoying and buzz around you. Most importantly smile =)

A small little note for you

it takes time I know

maybe a week or a few for you to realize this ?

anyway, you know who am i referring to

Gee

*Hahahaha* Jay Chou - Pandamen !! You guys are just too handsome and those music and piano is awesome !! Guess what. Im not going online for this 5 weekdays. I cant and never get to live without IT but yeah I can do it I know. Super contrast right. I forgot what I wanted to write from the very start, so what I did now is just this random crap.

Oh ya, don't challenge me. I know I look so short, little and small but never look down on my strength. I can scream louder than you and fight better than you. I always win in fight, so beware. *evil* Sorry for that great pain I put on you, I don't do it in purpose, I just can't control myself. So what I did was trying this new thing - meditation class. Its what people though was bored but what bring peacefulness to me. Its not hard for me ( nothing interrupt me when Im meditating ) as this is what I did all the time when there's anger in me. I love how it brings me calmness and happiness =)

So yeah, bye. Gonna date with all those adorable book. Im gonna make them all fall in love with me, haha. Coming updates shall be next week and Im gonna tell you how crazy they fall for me.

You changed

As time pass, people change. Hoping for the positive changes but all I get is those negative ones. Maybe there's a bit of environment influence. But after all, we as a smart ones should know how to choose the right path. Choosing is always the hardest part for us. Is like the road not taken. There's no turning back after all. We gotta build up those strength that we might not have previously and walk till the end until the finishing point. You're no longer the one I knew. You change. A lot. Everyday facing the computer, hanging around with mobile phone and sticking the phone next to the ear all day long is just pretty not good. Screaming and shouting here and there is an act which a fool does not us. Very sorry to say I hate the new you. Can the old ones come back =(

Everyone have their own limit. Having pms is always an excuse. I hate saying this, but what more can I say. Im not those kepo ladies cause I know everyone have secret to be kept. You will tell that particular person when you feel too. Forcing, I don't likey. Anyhow, you truly disappoint me this time. Gosh, I hate being emo. And this happen all the time when I start typing one post. Always get distracted by those tiny so not important things. Hate being that silly. Improvement needed perhaps.

F.O.M.S ?

Im fine

The biggest lie everyone did by saying IM FINE when we are not at all. Sometimes, we are just too lazy to explain or tell the whole story all over again. Refreshing silly incident that happened is just too sad. "How are you and she now ?" This random question of yours made me blank for a moment. How could I answer this when we aren't been talking for this moment of time.

We are often being tagged by our physical appearance. So, yeah, I hate being called nerd when im not smart enough.

Fishing in the ocean

After years of not swimming, I finally get myself a swimming suit. Is time to built some muscle and burn those fats which stuck on my tummy.

Zeeeeee

Guess what, that stands for zon ekonomi eksklusif which is mine presentation title. This title leave me nothing much. There's no way for elaboration and I only get to type for 3 lines ? Its going to be very short and weird. You wouldn't have ignored if you cared. Jealousy kills so do anger does. I never get to understand cause im just simply dumb. I miss the time when we are young, running around the school corridor, hiding message under desk from teacher's sight, heading towards the canteen earlier than others, hit and smack each other like nobody business. Its just simply innocent and lovely. So, can you don't just disappear suddenly leaving me hanging here and there, at least tell me where will you go and where had you gone.

Please be aware of your money or valuable belonging. The world is going insane and people is crazy in money. This leads to the increasing of stealing incident. So, be careful. Just a small little advice from me.

How would it be

Walking on top of the cloud is cooling and freezing but yet awesome like what the picture shows. Somehow I wanted to escape from all those facts and cruel reality that kills. It would be pretty awesome if you get whatever you wish and hope to, but its impossible. Effort need to be made and somehow it may be a waste. People will appreciate on your hard work. The smile on them is enough after all. It melts your heart and no more hoping for more. I myself do experience failure. Working so hard but I get no return for all those hard work. Will felt kinda upset for this very short period but after all think on the positive side. There's always positive and negative sides in everything perhaps. With this, you will be certainly enlighten. Giving others a chance while we can get to rest for a moment, aren't this sounds good. It will be very tough to walk through. Hatred will always wonder and knock on your door paying you a visit, get through it and you gonna be success in your life few years after.

All alone again and yeah back to study. Signing off

It kills

Im just darn stupid. Though of closing the whole SU file today and I can be free from those burden. Yet this small tiny stone hit me right to my head and wake me up from this sleepy blury dream. I still left this whole load of report haven been done. And photo is something very headache. Kind of me to remind the next board for not repeating the same stubborn mistake. I shall get everything fix as fast as possible, not torturing myself. I learn my lesson. We can't really depends and rely on others. Ask lots is what we don't really go for it and this is what needed on us. Please be really kind to me as I don't have much time left, all due date is reaching so soon. I have to really control myself to not doing nonsense, being busybody and what so ever. Im currently holding nothing, im left there flying, hanging or somehow been thrown to any holly place.

Judging me

... you can't do that. Hey, I suppose you should think of yourself first. I have my limitation. Don't create problems and stand there like a stick hoping others to solve it for you. Acting doesn't works all the time. Its just a fairy tale of the sheep and wolf. Don't try to blindfold others and make them lose direction because of your foolish act. The fool will once awake and learn from the lesson. I did my job and I get pretty well feedback from others. But sorry for your case, you get comment by others and now trying hard to declare something which aren't right. Go on with it if you think its right, I'll pray for you. I get distract easily and I need kinda long time to recover from that scar. So, please don't hurt me with intention, I know you don't. I hope my remaining little trust on you do worth after all cause its kinda decreasing day by day which make me a bit worried. After expressing those silly feelings I had, I get a bit relief after all, I suit the name "chun chun" I guess. *sigh* Meditation is all I need before studying for tomorrow biology test ;)

" Everyone has different paths to walk, different goals to achieve. Stay strong no matter what obstacle you may face. Even if you should fall along the way, you have to keep walking, keep running. " ------ thanks pekpek

He

Crying and screaming in the same path isn't cool after all, ugly instead. Think before you speak as words do kill somehow. I apologize sincerely with all my heart. Sorry for what I had done in mistake or in purpose. Turning to a new ones by drawing and sketching out my new path way (life).

Its not delicious

Its food web after all

and its C-O-M-P-L-I-C-A-T-E-D !!

Things are getting tough

Gotta really settle down everything

canyoureallygetwhatimthinkingihopeso

I couldn't believe this

Sounds like hacked email title ? This is what i felt recently. I got to admit AGM is the best thing to be happened and its a worst thing to be happened as well. We finally get to throw away all the burden on us and yeah we get to walk straight after all, no more arch back. However, there's always argument between the fake and real ones. Maybe this is what I called the time to judge how strong friendship bond is. Its hard for everyone I guess but we do need to walk across those obstacle and leave those ugly footstep behind, keep moving on to the bright side where sunshine hide.

Study !! I think I ruin my monthly test for maths once more. Why aren't it goes as smooth as how it is previously. More exercise needed I guess. Group study after school, anyone ? Chemistry is better I guess, please touch my target. Kinda in love with chemistry recently, its just awesome how its react by looking the outcome. Happy Birthday Mdm Khor !! Her birthday falls on yesterday which is 19th July. A surprise party for her yesterday by her beloved student (our class) *self praise*. Her smile is beautiful !! Its biology experiment today. DISSECTION !! Oh gosh, sorry this tiny little mice. Your heart is still pumping which I realize it very late. I take out the whole strength and braveness in me, my hand was shivering. My very first time and its going to be my very last time I guess.

How I wish im the reason of yours, that's pretty impossible I know. Well, back to study, monthly test is still going on. I need to get myself discipline.

Failure

Im redoing and recycling my mistake once more. Doing work last minute is just so not awesome. Tons of report to type spending me hours in front of this laptop. Im destroying my brain cell in times, very bad habit I had, knowing it but not changing it. So, this is me. Worried for a few hours, days and yeah give me one week and I will forgot everything which I need to worry about.

Another exam is coming. They called it monthly test. Next week will gonna be chemistry and maths. Scoring high scores is everyone aim of course im included. Hit upon the moon and you may somehow landing on the star. So, A this time, pls. Never once get an A in my whole form 6 life, sad till the max *sobsob* So serious study for at least this 2 days.

Everyone wants to know that they're not alone. But facts always kill. Lots of AGM going on and on. And I myself don't really like this. Its often ruins friendship, no offence, its just purely my own opinion. People comes and leaves, thats life. We still need to move on with or without them. No one can really teach you who and who you could not mix with, who and who you should be with or who and who you should love. Let the right ones in and let the wrong ones go. Everyone have their own problem, it could be friend problem, family problem or even relationship problem. Truth or dare game is super rare now, no ones daring to play this anymore, its just getting dangerous.

Everything will be fine as time pass. Wait for someone who approach you and tell you that you were amazing. There will and must be someone. You may say im a dreamer, but im not the only one. Stop searching for forever, happiness is just beside you. So smile =)

I just get to chat for 5 lines with my junior ? His profile pic is just super adorable. He is currently studying in this alike kampung place which he proclaim is not kampung (no entertaiment) ? But with this beautiful beach beside him is more than enough. Scream to this ocean with all heart when you are feeling stress out and this super nice feeling of walking on the sand with bare feet which city people cant even get to.

Not to forget, my email is officially blocked. Someone hacked me i guess ? And mummy and daddy got me a new fengshui bracelet and necklace, thanks even though I had more than enough of it. =)

Kids are still adorable for me

Underdog

I just wasted the whole entire day of yesterday doing absolutely nothing. Yes, you got me. Hanging around with no plan and destiny is totally an 'X'. The stupidity on me just pop out and say hello to me and I just cant concentrate in my studies. Mind wondering around alice wonderland. The worst part on the day ending up with peeling of my skin. Oh yea, its itchy. Bloods flowing out like a river non-stop. Playing with menstrual cycle, nah, its just a cut near my elbow because of my carelessness which no one ever knows how could I felt down that careless on a flat lane without any obstacle. Oh well, I just need to zip up my mouth as soon as possible and force myself to turn for a new and better one. I don't like to talk cause anything that come out of my mouth will indirectly make someone feel uneasy. So, I never really use to talk a lot. Things that come out will just be erm, oh, ok and so on. I just need someone to teach me to talk. Conversation like that ends very fast and suddenly it will be this total silent mode which is terribly awkward. Things is just attacking me and maybe me myself who always make this argument which is just aren't there to talk about. I favours perfection, everything must be in order and nice to be observe. Im not that very fussy ones but everything should have this backup plan to cover up the first plan which couldn't really works. Im being crapping too much i guess. Losing hours yesterday and today shall be the returning ones. No facebook today, Im so going to restrict myself and I know I can still live without it

SHE

I saw tears rolling in her eyes

Its all the wind fault who blows up the sand

Bang

There goes my first accident after 1+ year driving. (Its just a small ones which the car bumper kiss the door gate, bang it and later drag it for few cm to m) "Now you know why you are not allow to drive alone" my parents say. Im just being careless and a bit not concentrating while driving. So here is a small reminder to everyone : Remember to look at the front, back and also the side mirror all the time especially when you are doing the reversing part.

Kkrinnngggggg

Is time to wake up Jingwei, no dreaming pls

From time to time it turns worst

Worst feeling ever I had

Tears flooding my eyes which gonna burst out anytime

You never get to stand beside me

I needs your shoulder and your lap

If only im brave in front of you

Do whatever I wanted to do

And cry out my sorrow

I need this bit time of yours for me

Im selfish, im greedy

I know all that

I never want to lose nor give up on anything im on with

So 5 more months to the actual exam

3 more months to trial exam

1 more month to prove myself

You just make me mad

Look after me

I will be much better than you do

Hardly find one

My brother is troublesome, he will only turn nice if he wants something from me. Ish ish, no manners. Gentleman is so rare here in this world. I hardly get to see one. Everyone pass by and gone, no one really stay. Being independent is the one thing I need to learn badly. Oh ya, you don't get jealous on what I have as I don't really have much for you to envy about. There's always an reflection on everything. People treat back you the way you treat them, so be nice to others so that you get the right treatment. Be mindful on your speech. Every reason you search to cover up your mistake is just an excuse. Bear on this. People really need to work up on this.

Is that a dog ?

I HATE people screaming, shouting nor barking at me

You better shutup before I explode

you wont want this to happen, trust me

Love you

Omgosh, I love you 180 !! You are just too lovely for me. Its a passing mark for band 4 and its what I aim for at least. Grrr~ As all beings know, my english is so-not-that-good, haha. Lose quite a lot of marks at the speaking part, reminds me about that particular incident, arghh forget about it, its already the past, at least I got what I wanted.

My mid year exam paper is just too lousy. Dont feel like talking about it. Especially my maths result, the worst I ever had in my life. I know someone feels like slapping me, come ahead, you shall get it from me first. Every time I complain about how my results goes, there must be someone there interrupting me. I feel like eating up that person. Maybe I should just close my paper and shutup every time I get my paper. Oh ya, im pretty mad now.

Talking about how amazing things change after 7 years. Yupppp.. finally a successful gathering for the 6 monkeys class last saturday night which eventually kinda celebrating while attending one of our classmate wedding. Its a wedding buffet dinner and we are the noisiest among her guess. 30 out of 50 monkeys attending and its an awesome night. Seeing how classmate change as they grown. Well im the only left which is not growing I guess. Time to pick up some dress and learn about makeup. Maybe I seriously need those common knowledge.

I taught you understand me. Like others say great expectation comes great disappointment. 181, 180 needs you.

starbucks

Stuck here again

like usual im being force here to study

reason : because my room have this comfortable bed which make me lay on it and after few mins dang im sleeping soundly.

call me a PIG

School gonna reopen soooo soon

and I know all I need is to study

gotta face my MUET result which is gonna to be released on Mon, first day of school itself. Wish me luck. Band 4 will do. *pray*

I shall just end here.

Study is all I need

I know I sounds nerdy, well this is me for now till STPM I guess.

Not gonna give up this time, will fight till the end. I will beat you down one day. Yeah, im aiming on you, watch out

Hey handsome

I look like a boy now

cut my hair again not even after 2 months

so call me handsome =)

too bad I cant date a guy with this kinda look

Hey you

Knowing you for so-not-long

finally we argue

HAHAHA XD

You better watch out before you become my breakfast, lunch and dinner as well =9

*you know who you are*

Boredom

im bored.pretty bored.very bored.freaking bored

its just the second day of my school holiday =(

The words in book just look so dead without study partner.

My condition now is just a no no to starbuck. No ice, no coffee. No use sitting there.

Online study may be a better choice, I hope

Every time i tried

the truth is, i miss you

all the time, every second, every minute, every hour, every day

Will you have that smile on your face when my name appears on your phone ?

I like it when you smile, but I love it when Im the reason =)

Sitting next to you doing absolutely nothing means absolutely everything to me

You and I are going to be okay. You know that right ?

Move on. Its just a chapter in the past. But don't close the book. Just turn the page

Thats what I got after having a visit at tumblr *wink*

Finally

Exam is OVER and Im pretty sick X(

"you are very very very friendly....very easy going...but watch out with who you mix with ah...take care =D"

thanks vendrick *touched* i will. All the best to you =)

还是回忆

“过了那么多年，她再次遇见他

还是被吓了一下

虽然早已知道会在遇见

可能一切都是天意吧”

这位老朋友啊，
真的很久很久没跟你聊上几句了
还记得去年刚入学时，大家还玩闹了一番
但，那也许就是最后一次了
我们再也回不到曾经的那么一天
我们就像熟悉的陌生人一样
曾天擦声而过
连最基本的打招呼也没了
照理来说因该没人知晓我你是认识的吧
也许过去也只能当成是回忆
人都要往前看
而我偏偏就是那个一直往后张望的人
他们都说时间能冲淡一切
是把回忆也给冲掉吧
现在，我还是把书给念好
其他的以后再说

I care

You don't take it serious when I mean it, you don't know how much I care. As you know, that irritating person is pulling everyone apart from me one by one with those annoying rumours which i don't really care as long as you have this believe in me. Grr~ I realize how weird it is to talk to one after an argument is made. You can't really talk that lively like how we crap and make jokes with each other in the past. Everything turns awkward. Was kinda disappointed when you turn things this way which I do mind. Eww~ Was turning kinda geli I knew.

Don't leave me all alone again. I really really do care for what you say. But after all, you never get to make me jealous. Try again next time, sorry that I failed your plan. Don't hate me, pls, sorry, haha. Nah, you won't and never get to hate me, cause im just too cute, hehe XP *poke poke* Kinda sudden addicted with it.

Your voice touches me, thanks for that call. If you appear in front of me, I will surely hug you tight tight and may cry on your shoulder. To be honest, I was totally not fine this week. I need to talk, crap and complain. No more for you wanni, you sleep before I finish my complain, how dare you. *Done*

Another day

Its another midnight. I got lots of things to do and to study but Im here hanging on the net facing the computer as thou nothing will happen. Maybe Im a spider in the previous life. So, I shall crap all the way throughout the whole post.
This shall be my last post before exam I guess ? The orientation week for those juniors maybe fun to some but not all. Urghh.. and I miss that performance part which is interesting in a way. Wednesday is the day which I and all other senior receive lots of sweet. Thanks junior for being that generous especially to my junior, Chew Wai Hoong. I finally remember his name *proud* How was your driving exam ? It should be a pass. Join St.John Club if anyone is interested to attend school on a saturday, it will be nice with me and you.
For so long I never online in this late night. Oh well, I seriously don't know what happen to me which make me feel so ill here. Exam is really so soon and I don't even had the time to study. Happy Teacher's Day to all teachers. I appreciate those hard works you had done to all students. Their flying colour result may pay back all your bitterness. *smile*
How long can I stand tonight ? Sounds like destroying myself right, hmphh.. Maybe the tone just doesn't sounds right. I don't really understand myself, anyone can ? Anyhow Im pushing to the high gear tomorrow so that I can enjoy my break after those exam. Stay away from the laptop, hopefully i get to resist those leisure thingy.
Relatives is always the best, its a strong covalent bond which can withstand lots of energy. We are on the same path walking towards sunshine. 1, 2, 3... =)

Upgraded

Okay, Im relaxing once again and yet my exam is around the corner. One week to go and I don't think I manage to study everything? I really need something to push me towards the max.
Anyway, Im turning to a senior by tomorrow, the form 6 juniors are entering tomorrow. Praying hard for nice junior, MPP you see this, mark this down. Uncleeee, here you come :)
Erm erm nothing more I guess, just one year older ?

Lost and Found

Im bored. Waiting for stories. Will see you by tomorrow. You got to tell me how's your life for this whole week. Oh ya, did you help me in spotting handsome guy? You know I needed. So, thats all for now.Is just a simple post for you as I found this cute pic

Flashback story

I just don't feel good to be surrounded by immoral people. Anyhow, I felt much better right now. I love breathing fresh air. Those place which all mans are pure minded and simple in thinking. Walking alone in peace. Kampung people is extra friendly. They greet every teacher respectfully. Not like students here which try their very best to avoid every single teacher and talk rudely to them. Kids in kampung cycle here and there with their bike freedomly. They enjoy life. I envy them really a lot. I hate her for being so rude to my dad. Shut up your big mouth, its ugly with your big bunch of hair and you are already 12 !! What a waste for studying moral lesson for this 6 years. The lucky part for me is none of my kids behave like you do. If ever you join my class, take my words, you be the very first one I kick out

trustworthy

Im one kind of people whose mood can get affected easily by people or things surrounding me. Its swings really really fast. For that one moment, my heart sank, I really felt the bond between us break just like that. Anyway, thing turns fine after that. Im a straight person. Somehow the way I talk really hurts but Im just telling the truth. Its not mean actually, just a silly joke I made which is so not funny. I dont use to turn around the bush, its tiring and thats need lots of brain cell which I dont have any extra for crapping session, I need all of them for study. Dont get cheated by my look. I know I look really nerdy which everyone taught that Im smart ?! Fuuuh~ Im really not smart. Somehow I wish I dont look that nerd after all. Fashion ?! I dont know any either. Wearing loose shirt and loose pant, my favourite =) Dont ever interrupt me when Im doing my talking. I dont felt nice. I will just shut up my mouth and stop talking for the entire conversation later or if there's space I will just walk away. That shall pay back your act.

Story time

"John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, 'If I were any better, I would be twins!'

He was a natural motivator.

If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, 'I don't get it!'

'You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do i t?'

He replied, 'Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or...you can choose to be in a bad mood

I choose to be in a good mood.'

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it.

Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or...I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

'Yeah, right, it's not that easy,' I protested.

'Yes, it is,' he said. 'Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life.'

I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.

I saw him about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, 'If I were any better, I'd be twins...Wanna see my scars?'

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.

'The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter,' he replied. 'Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could choose to die. I chose to live.'

'Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?' I asked.

He continued, '...the paramedics were great.

They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action...'

'What did you do?' I asked.

'Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me,' said John. 'She asked if I was allergic to anything 'Yes, I replied..' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity''

Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.'

He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude...I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything.

Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.'

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. "

One cut and paste story from hotmail

Happy Birthday ESMAN

Happy Birthday !! Its so not suprise I know =X That teacher really banyak kacau, you really got to spare out one day for me, I need to talk !! Grrr.. My stomach is empty and I feel like eating you up. Gonna chop of your hand, peel your skin, look into the flesh and smell the blood. I need story to brighten up my day and Im craving for it. Anyway, hmphhh about the present, you really need to keep it nicely although its ugly which you declare thats nice ? I know is ugly la, you no need to give face to me although I spend the whole night doing that while you are soundly sleeping in your bed, hnn. Anyway, thats so not a confess letter cause I dont know how to write one either. Best friend forever, smile =) Your shall be your girlfriend YOURMAN, but keep ESMAN for me, I know you will =) Thats one thing I found out today morning, did you grow taller ? You look damn tall for me once again, see how long we didn't meet and date each other =X

Special note and post for you. See how good I treat you. You must be touch-kan, hehe. Read all those 13 notes and I shall see how you react later. There is some which I simply crap as I cant think of any others yesterday. P/s : Don't complain too much hah

I LOVE BANANA

Its silly when someone shouted something on you which make everyone turn their head towards you. Im just an ordinary girl who wants to live a simple life. Im not any LOA who needs lots of attention. Students priority is to study and get good result for their exam and thats what Im doing now. Mid year is around the corner and its exactly one month later. So, to all there who is studying, gambateh, we can make a difference after all =) Read a nice passage which I wanted to share, but my mouse is not functioning, so thats all for my post today. Will see how when days pass by.

I LOVE BANANA =D

Very short

I cut my hair again. I don't know why I just cant bare with it. But this time, me myself admit that its very very short, I look like a primary student once again. I guess I wont be returning to that saloon again at least within this year. I wasted 4+ hours to cut this silly looking hair xD Was figuring what my kids will say about me tomorrow. And meeting to attend. With this short hair, grrr~ I think I shall say I putus cinta again. *sigh*

Everyone was talking about how great or terrible their MUET exam is, so do I. I only favours the writing part which I can crap along although is short as well. For reading and listening, another sigh. Can I still hope on band 4 ?

Presented to you HAO MI

Time flews. Today is my mum's birthday which I realise only after 6pm which means there is another 6 more hours left. How forgetful I am. Her students celebrate it by buying her a cake in school while Im asking her why is there a cake today at home. How stupid I am to forget this important date of hers. Sorry mum for being such a forgetful child which put all her effort on the computer and exams. This is specially presented to you

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM !!! love you

For repay, i shall try my very best in tomorrow MUET exam. Hopefully it turn out somehow like my midterm exam is good enough

Don't come torturing me

Its here again,grr~ Gastric, I hate you, you gotta remember this. Im having exam by tomorrow and yet you come and disturb me like nobody buisness. Can you just LMA, I still need to study for my exam. Eating pain killer every moment to stop you from weakening me doesn't sounds good, but thats the only way I though of. I do eat for 3 meals Mr.gastric, I just skipped my recess and eat my lunch slightly late. I doesn't suits you, can you just find some other else or just disappear just like that. Pls~

Im not a BANANA

I know I look damn chineseeee~ No one ever said I dunno chinese, NEVER. But, my chinese is just so-not-good. Whoever speaks chinese with me will surely critise me for speaking bad chinese, grr~ but now I can proudly announce, I get a B for my SPM chinese paper !! Woots, its just way to awesome =D

The examinor love my essay i guess. My essay is awesome !! not those primary school level essay like you guys said. I know you guys is envy about me. But what to do, Im just good in persuading the examinor. Hahaha XD just joking =P

Im lovin it

This is my breakfast this morning. Wake up super early and yet I still need to line up for an hour to try this brand new big breakfast, luckily Im on the driving thru lane, at least I dont have to stand. Its very worthy anyway. You guys shall try this asap as the dateline is on 31th Mac.

Im proud of you

OMGawd, my sis get straight A's for her SPM !! She finally make it to her way. Im soooo proud of her *seriously*. Scholarship ,thats what she looking for now =X Way to a professional engineering =D

Ah See, you are great as well. Another straight A's fellow. Congratz =D Way much better than me =X Listen to my advise, try to persuade your parents and siblings. Its really a waste if you go accordingly to your parents will but not yours. Pls say NO at least for once, its your future, go for it, I know you can, trust me

So after all, its my turn now. Way to my STPM exam. Study smart the key to success =)

Its me

9月7日（海王星&#战车）代表人物：伊莉莎白一世（英国女王）

具有坚强意志，不怕任何困难，不断追求自我成功；有丰富的想像力和创造力，好胜心很强。
优点是非常认真、勤勉，专注在自己的目标上，专心一志。
缺点是太敏感，不容易接纳别人；太喜欢和别人争辩。

I dont feel it anymore

I DON'T FEEL FUN ON FACEBOOK ANYMORE =(

save me~

Sometimes i just need this

Looking for shoulder to lay on, rely on and count on

I found a room which really helps me a lot, thanks to you-know-who-you-are. Thanks for letting out the room =) Im gonna appreciate it with all my heart.

Im memang a small kid *gimme sweet*

Once again

Once again Im receiving those negative feedback. I don't have any extra time to solve all those problems once again. My heart do break for once and its more than enough. Im immune now, too bad right, huh... Don't go over my limit, I didn't scream at you but pressing deep underneath just because I don't wanna ruin our friendship. But, this doesn't mean you can just do whatever you like without caring about my feelings. Don't cross over the line again, grrr~ or I may explode, you don't wanna see this right, so please get rid of your bad habits which I really dislike. I may only one of those friend which you call to fill up your empty space friend. So I may concentrate on my study and trying to get use of being alone.

Esman, had been a long time we never sit down and talk, I miss those moment :) Having extra class today, find another time (after those exam) okay, i need to talk with you X( Good luck in your exam, hmphhh.. hopefully you get first place in your class which you aiming for it ?

Oh ya, Burlesque is awesome !! Is finger licking good for guys to watch that, dripping of saliva perhaps ?! Overall, is really worthy watching this, my 2nd 18 years old and above movie. Koko thanks for that, Im betting for the mid year exam, watch out, Im gearing up !!

Lastly, I wanted to say I SALUTE trafic police =)

Is a random post which I crap everything in it

Just bare with this

This is it

This is why Im still standing tall here waiting and as well as defending all those circumstance that block my way. I really wanna try this form 6 life which many of them claim that is hard. I know I can do this if i push myself a bit just a bit not too hard. So peeps pls pray for me by now. Im so gonna score for the mid year paper at least one A X)

I want to become

.... NERDY !! Yes at least for this year, pls~

My result is getting worst day by day. More and more things to be absorb and learn. And my brain just dont use to memorize things as my memory stick is limited. Understanding take times and I cant really stand too long with books, I will apparently fall asleep on the desk or on the bed. Im changing my tactic once again. Found out staying back study in school works somehow. And waking up 1 hour earlier to study before check in to school. I need to gear up my studies before is too late as I know STPM is seriously the toughest exam. Senior is getting their STPM result last Monday and because of their super awesome result (14 people got 4 flats and 100% pass), we juniors get to get back earlier and R&D is cancelled for that particular day. Proud of ping an for getting 4 flats. You are the one and only senior I get to know seriously, gonna listen to your advise and follow your path, bless me. So, time for me to study instead of wasting time on the net ?

My blog gonna be partially dead

It repeats and repeats by itself

This is my daily routine.

Im getting tired living my life in this way. Maybe study more, play less helps somehow in my study. I can always feel regret on things I had done, but I can as well as forget things i regret previously easily, kinda dangerous people. Im seriously imbalanced. Anyway, Im improving for a better life.

Maybe some nap do help now =X

A new start

In these few more days, chinese new year holiday is going to be OVER. And Im going back for studies. Seriously trying to be serious this time. STPM is getting nearer and nearer by time. And only till now (after chit chatting with my aunt) I realise Im the very first person taking STPM in this BIG family. Anyway, its still chinese new year now.
Handsome uncle and pretty aunty, thanks for the angpau again. You are seriously handsome with your cute smile, YES i mean you (anthomaniac-ing) XD Travel around the whole kampung in ampang yesterday and I got loads of angpau, of course eat and drink a lottt, till my stomach hurts X(
And i turn very bored today, maybe is time for study (like what mummy said) as exam is just after this holiday ? So, i shall have my date with PA and Chemistry now. *wink*

Happy CNY

Happy chinese new year peeps !! Is a brand new RABBIT year =) Study hard, study smart and Whee~ Super Duper Nice Result !!!

Have the reunion dinner with my aunt. Old people do felt lonely when all their kids grown up, having girlfriend/boyfriend and later get married and leave the house. This is what happens to my aunt. Wake up early at the very first day of chinese new year and went to the temple just now, there are this lion dance performance and i forgot to bring my camera =X

very very short post

Hi and Bye again

Hi, a short update here. Wenying, our buddhist society ex-president, she is going to TAIWAN for her further study. So, this is a small farewell party by the buddhist society club in this vegetarian restaurant. I had my first "lau-sang" for this CNY. Oh yeah, do anyone notice something freaking different here? Yup, i didnt wear my buddhist society attire, i mean club T, and why everyone is so damn smart to wear it here, grrr~ feel like digging one big hole to hide inside XD Anyway after that, we head all the way to Setia Alam Pasar Malam, buying nothing actually, just walk as we are full and guess what again, we met the god of fortune and yeah we got free sweets from him =)

Im having exams the week just after this Chinese New Year holiday. And Im so serious flipping through all the books by now, hoping for a better grade which I target for ? Sooo.. Bye for now

Im reaching for the sky =)

Have been a long time (1 year?) since I last climb the hill. So was really excited about this trip. Got up really very early, 4.50am ? Its thursday and its a public holiday, this make this broga hill very pack !! Was kinda enjoy climbing up, not that tiring after all. The tough part came when we need to proceed down, its was kinda slippery and I get to slide for quite a distance. Was taking my own sweet time not caring about who ever behind me who is already frustrated. Cut me if you want, go ahead, I wont block you =X

sad for not climbing up till the end for that Gunung Tok Wan

cause the sky suddenly went dark, daddy and mummy scare its rain after that X(

Oh ya, one polite reminder

Dont try to climb the hill if you cant do so, maybe exercise a bit at home before climbing those hill as you will bring troublesome to many people if you ever faint half way. This is what I saw that day, hospitality, policeman, bomber, penyelamat and etc. just to carry that one person up there.

I WISH

Everyone do have a wish

and my wish is not being fulfill X(

Sometimes it takes a good fall to really know where you stand

I online for the whole week again, sigh

hopefully, no more for tomorrow =(

Call me TEACHER =D

Im back to sunday school again for so long. Im officially a teacher here, whee~!! E1 is the class where you can get to see my adorable students. Hmphh.. its a foc job and you wont get to earn anything here other then dharmma knowledge and kids loving. Kids are all innocent. Watch them play and you will have joy in your heart no way.
I get to handle 8 kids today from E1 and E2, hopefully they get to listen to all those dharmma teaching lately as dharmma talk shall be a little bit boring to them as they are still young, hopefully I can cope that and they get to enjoy my lesson. Today is free chit-chatting time which I named it so that they talk more and show their true colour =X See you next week kids, hope you guys talk more like those sisters and brother from E2 which is so naughty but yet adorable ;) We shall start our lesson by next week.

Who is interested in teaching dharmma ? You are not going to receive any pay for this.

The english department is lacking of teacher.I cant stay long for this as Im having STPM this year and my parents is not very happy about this. Being my assistant, anyone ?

I FAILED X(

OKAY !! I checked my facebook everyday, cant really skip that checking process, grr.. Im addicted !!! I need to stop this before everything is too late, aiks .. I'll try again next week, hopefully one out of seven days I can live without facebook :)

First week of school ? Hmphh.. I felt this STPM pressure for now at the very first day of schooling. Lots of semangat on the very first day revising and doing homework. But after all, it lost a bit day by day, I left nothing now I guess XD In addition, I sleep a lottt in the afternoon and sleep late at night. Being imbalanced again ? Oh gosh =X I need to adjust everything so that its turn out right. 4.0 !! I need this badly and 4 for MUET is too enough for me i guess ?

Back to SCHOOL

Yeah, im still stuck in this high school life, kinda enjoy actually X) Gonna take STPM this year on the 21st Nov ? Anyway, im not going to stress myself for this yet. Will try my very best to study hard, grr~ I need to get 4.0 in my CGPA seriously, 4A's is what i aim for this year !! I really need to get use to study and make books as my beloved partner X)

Off to date with my book again

Is a NEW YEAR

New year with new resolution like what everyone said. Okay for me, i will decrease my online time and increase the study time. Im not going to deactivate my facebook account, never ever try to do that, cause i cant really life without that i guess =X But will on only for less than 2 hours every weekend ? So, im going to PIA for my STPM this time, seriously !! Wont be updating the blog that frequent anymore.. X(

Bye to this vitual world =X

and Hi to reality